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Written By: Monkey Boy

15 June 2010

How Much More Can I Take?

So its been just over 2 weeks since me and emily broke up and its getting harder every day.......i've had some stupid thoughts over that time period but nothing i would really do.

Im just so down and i can't seem to pick myself up at all.........the only times i feel better even the slightest is when i get a text from her, it just brightens my day up so much......maybe its cos we never went a full day without messaging each other at least once and now its once a week almost.

Its only been 2 weeks yet it feels like its been over 4 months since i last held her in my arms and told her how much i love her.......maybe thats the problem, maybe its cos i love her just so so much.

I wish things had been different in the relationship and i had been a little more forceful with one of the issues in particular, i really things would have been a lot different if i had been or if it had been different.

another thing that is killing me inside at the moment as well is that its like, and im sure it isn't the case but its like she's over it already........its like after 3 years of being with each other and loving each other she's just gone oh well time to move on.......i can't work out how she's done it as its only been 2 weeks and she's already moved on.

like i said im not saying this is the case as i like to think that i know her better then this but it is just the way things are coming across from her.

im still in hope that things change and we get back together after the summer but im not sure how she feels from how she's coming across to me.

anyway i just needed to rant as its all getting to much for me and i not sure if i can take anymore........talking to my housemate is all well and good and gets a lot of my chest but writing things out helps me so much more as i can kinda compile my thoughts into one block and then almost forget about it.

anyway, i'll talk to you all again soon and please remember to check my animation blog for other things i've been upto......not moping around the house things ^^

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